Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize