i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
