Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Randomize
