i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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