How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
there is puke in my bra ... again
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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