Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize