Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
