Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
well, you know. whores of a feather.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
