I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
