she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
