Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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