I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize