Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
