If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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