ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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