Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Your tits are I can't wait for
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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