We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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