What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
