and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize