we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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