i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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