ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
