38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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