she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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