Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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