i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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