he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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