Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
