porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
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