You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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