If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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