so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
