I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Randomize
