he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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