Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
