...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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