Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Even my vagina gasped.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize