Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize