I want to walk on stilts...naked
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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