ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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