Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
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