she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize