The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He? As in you personified your dick?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
