ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
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