how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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