I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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