Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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