its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
