two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
She announced her abortion via fbk
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize