im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
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