We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
