Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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