Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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